MAD Part 2: The Interview

Preparation
- Trawl the internet for 4 hours on how to buy a new suit.
- Consider 3 buttons, 2 vents, more wool than polyester and ponder between classic black, quiet grey, navy blue and adventurous stripes - consider philosopical questions from friends "Are you zebra?"
- Try out 32 new suits in 4 different showrooms - blow off persistent salesman with specific requirement of "a single vented, three-button grey suit with a 75:25 wool ratio and flatfronted trousers".Run away while he's searching.
- Read up on schools; read up on courses; read up on interviews;practice talking in front of toilet mirrors, surprise maintenance staff at office.
- Hum out answers in the elevator; practice body language and try to act natural when the lift opens on your classic "If I were to slice my career into 4 signficant parts" gesture.
- Dress up for interview.
- Wear just tie, vest and boxers...walk around...just to get those streaks of juvenile lunacy off before the big hour.
- Practice "Serious look", "Thoughtful look", "Look of awe and wonder" and "Thinking fingers aka twirling thumbs".
- Look stupid in sticky new suit.
- Look stupid in sticky new suit in an auto in Bangalore.
- Look very stupid in sticky itchy new suit in front of 3 giggling schoolkids.
- Look very stupid in sticky itchy new suit in front of Nepali gurkha who says interviewers office is closed.
- Consider Vanaprastha in the Himalayas.

Week after 1 okkkkkay interview and 1 good interview
- Start gathering statistics about interviewed vs. selected.
- Pore through Business Week's selectivity and yield ratios for different schools.
- Try to create historical trends and juxtapose them against respective country GDPs and come up with a statistical trend to prove favourable future. (Only for experienced MS Office users; at this point, novices to consider The Art Of Living courses).
- Read interviewed University brochures again and again hoping that the greater laws of the universe will work in favour of those putting in really hard work...ie staring at pretty women in brochures er..sorry...assimilation of the school's culture and statistics.

Week 2 after 1 okkkkkay interview and 1 good interview
- Get smarter...install mobile Gmail on phone.
- Check Gmail on phone every 10 minutes.
- Stop just visiting applicant blogs and instead start commenting - "you got anything yet? what abt u? huh...me too ;-("
- Micro Schadenfreudish relief at people who havent got any invites from your fav schools....then realize the tilting of cosmic scales against you...quickly ask forgiveness and try to swing the scales again...muditaaaaahhhhh! (Powers of the Universe to take note)

Who says life is not beautiful...atleast until Dec 20/21.